Fullight, Fulbright, First Ful I see tonight

Fresh from carefree spring breaks, Sphinx was ready to throw off the sunblock and throw on their thinking caps. Penn and Philadelphia were not willing to let students ease back into the swing of things, however. Tumultous weather changes, another loss in the NCAA tournament, and a general epidemic of Acapulcan crabs, threatened to put a damper on the last few weeks of school. Fortunately, Sphinx members know no obstacles and were spotted doing generally remarkable things. Generally.

First on tap, as further confirmation that the Japanese can make both VCRs and scholars better than us, Mana was cited “WINNING AN F-ING FULBRIGHT SCHOLARSHIP!!!” for study in the land of the rising sun. She is reported to have responded with a measured and low-key expression of approval. Sources also surmise that Mana is “SeRiOUsly so XXCiteddd and THANK you guyssss sooooooo MucH! <3> To learn more about this seriously prestigious award, go here. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fulbright_Program In other Mana-tastic news, the phenom presented at her first sociology conference on Saturday morning, which is "very impressive for an undergrad.”

Following along on the honor train, 14 Sphinx were tapped as finalists for the Senior Honor Awards (out of 30 finalists in total). Friars had a “surprisingly strong showing with 4 candidates.” Better luck next time...

Finally in our achievements section, Lex was cited being "awesome morning, noon and night." Oh, and she was also notified that she'd been chosen inaugural Penn Gay and Lesbian Alumni Award of Merit. To further Lex's embarrassment of riches, she received a job offer in Boston with the Fund for Public Interest research. "It means she can stay in the country!" Somewhere a kangaroo cried.

Moving on to this week's social notes, Andy Kaplan was spotted at MAd4 with his two best friends from Kansas. All three wore matching polo shirts in different colors. While Andy's shirt was not pink, his drink was. In sports, Josh Head was cited leading the Mask and Wing Intramural Basketball Team to the playoffs. The team won their first game 41-11 but fell in the semifinals when the team's lack of rebounding skills could no longer be compensated for through "stunning looks and bootylicious short shorts." Also, Ryan spotted Chris Mizell at the gym -- twice. He was looking studly and ready to kick arse on March 23.

In this week's culinary section, Ryan was cited in Platt Performing Arts House manning an “impromptu brownie station with style.” His grandmother had sent him a usual shipment of brownies and baked goods. Also as usual, Ryan ate only one of them and pawned the rest off on passers-by as part of his “get hot before it gets hot” campaign.

In the arts, Catie V., Brett, Jareau, and Brandon were cited watching Israel, Ewurama and Dominique at the Gospel Choir concert. That wasn’t all that Brett wanted to see this week, however. Sources say he tried to see Healey's naked ass at multiple events throughout the week, and succeeded at Ezra's Shabbat dinner. On an unrelated note, lovers of Maureen Dowd, Paul Krugman and Thomas Friedman rejoiced as Brett and the UA brought the NY Times for free to Penn's campus.

Back to talking about Healey’s ass, Catey Mark was cited kicking it “at a very intense, record-breaking tall game of drunk jenga” at her house on Saturday night. Sources tell us that the St. Patty’s day party at Catey’s place was "off-the-hook" and a "wonderfully awkward gathering of Sphinges." Brett and Catie "dominated the Beirut table," Caroline's boyfriend John "re-emerged" and "randoms" made out on the couches. Lex also had her first hetero kiss in awhile. Despondent lesbians protested nationwide.

As was mentioned earlier, Ezra hosted a Shabbat dinner with "riveting" conversation. Attendees discussed smegma (from Healey’s ass tattoo) and childhood jokes like: “your epidermis is showing!”Gaby, Brett, Ezra, Healey, Mana, Catey, and self-descrbied "pagan" Lex were in attendance.

In the meeting department, Healey, Ryan, and Caroline met to plan the stalking of the several hundreds of seniors who haven't yet donated to the Gift Drive. Luckily, that doesn't apply to anyone in Sphinx. Also, Srikant and Brett could be spotted eating crepes and talking about politics in Houston Hall, where they also strategized about Sphinx’s endowment and how to best approach Alumni Relations. Ezra also led a meeting for the Darfur rally which is starting to take shape..."contact Mana, Healey, Ezra or Catey if you want to get more involved." Finally, Mana, Brett, Lex and Head all sat on the balcony at the "often erratic" Paul Farmer speech.

In our virtual spotting segment, Nina was awesome as she sent out a google spreadsheet to gather our taps.

Everyone else was chilling with Dick Cheney in an undisclosed location.

- SC

EVENTS THIS WEEK :

A) Official: Monday – Group meeting at 10pm. Location TBA.

Tuesday – New Deck Happy Hour at 4:30

B) Unofficial:

Monday: “Close to Home: A Personal Perspective on Darfur” 7:30 in Huntsman 3:40. Jareau and Ewurama.

Wednesday: Betsy Ross's Bat Mitzvah Party at 8 p.m. at Hillel.

This is Ezra’s highest priority event thus far so try to make it.

Also at 8 pm, Caroline and Tri Delta are putting on a lecture by Regan Hoffman, entitled “Honesty & HIV: A Discussion of the Power of Full Disclosure”

Thursday: Mask and Wig show for those who haven't gone yet.